In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
