Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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