Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
