Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
