i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
