Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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