Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
