wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
