I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
