I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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