The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
