She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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