Swine flu is the new snow day.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Randomize
