Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
