You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
a search helicopter?!
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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