The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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