Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Randomize
