it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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