I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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