Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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