i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
