I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Randomize
