i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
