where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
