I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
