then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
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