She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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