Your tits are I can't wait for
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
