office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
