Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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