What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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