After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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