dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
