i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
