So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
