i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Randomize
