yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
