Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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