Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I have aggressive nipples.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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