I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
