There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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