I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Drunk walkin through police station. America
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
