your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
