Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
