a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Sorry about my life...
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
