Whoa Z and x make the same sound
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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