idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
