You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
