yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
