Jerry, you need to find god
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
i just made my gag reflex go away.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
