this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize